Music Speaks...

Here's a song I wrote...I have been feeling this stuff lately...Sorry for not posting much either...Especially stuff of depth...I have a lot to say but little time to say it...But I will for sure try to get on that...God is good...That is constant...

I don't have a name for it yet...Working on that...



I've put my hope in broken things
I've put my hope in shattered things
And all these thoughts I have are mine alone
All these hopes and dreams are mine alone

Who am I that I might speak for You
Who am I that I might walk for You

I have all these things on my mind
But none of them seem to lead anywhere
My heart seems to be the only thing
That I can feel tonight

Who am I that I might speak for You
Who am I that I might walk for You

I can't go back
I won't go back
To the day I fell

Who am I

Desolate Earth :: The End Is Here

You said
There was nothing left out here
Well I roamed around the wasteland

And I swear I found something

I found hope
I found God
I found the dreams of the believers
The dreams of the believers

Oh God, save us all...

Alone In The Wilderness...

So, throughout this school year and especially since I got back from Cambodia at the end of January, alone time has been scarce...I am in charge of a freshmen floor at my college and the demands are high...Everyone has a need of some kind, which I am totally cool with...I signed up for the job knowing what I was gonna get into to some degree...The problem is, I have had almost no time for myself...I blame myself some for that, I definitely missed opportunities to get that when I could...But with spring break this next week and no students around, I have decided to get that alone time...I'm going to go backpacking in Shenandoah National park in Virginia for a week...During the day when I'm going to hike alone and then camp at night with the buddies I am driving down with...I am stoked and scared for the alone time...I don't know what God will say or even if he will say anything...I know it may take a few days to clear my head of all my thoughts too...

I ask that you pray, if you believe in it...I just need to hear from God or at least feel Him a little again...I know He is there, but discouragement has been a theme for a bit now...I feel like I am a terrible student leader at college a terrible leader for my high school small group guys...I know it's Satan, but the lie has deceived me on occasion...

One more prayer...A guy close to me lost his dad a few nights ago...The family has a heavy burden now...Pray for them...

So here I go...Into the wilderness for five days, semi-alone and ready to just be free...

-Sinko

My Head and Heart...

Something has been bugging me lately about how I have been handling my relationships...Not just female, but those in particular I guess...I have had an agenda with them...This all sounds so middle-schoolish too, but with girls, I have maybe talked to them or given them attention not just to make friends, but for potential for a girlfriend someday...Now that I have been thinking about it, I don't think that is a good approach or a Godly approach...They are my sisters in Christ...Made in the image of God...

Why then, do I think like a middle-schooler? My first thought when I see my sisters in Christ are not honorable to them as such...Instead, I need to be looking at them as friends and people who can be a part of my life in such ways...

I've been in this place in my life where girls are on my mind all the time, and none of the time...I honestly feel like I am 14 years old or something...What's funny is that I just can't connect my heart and my head...In my head, I know that dating is not a necessity and that life single is great as well...I have lived in it pretty much my whole life...I love it...But for some reason, I can't tell my heart that I don't want to feel like I want to have a girlfriend...It's odd...

At the center, God is there...I know that putting this and any part of my life in his control is the only way to go...And I know that looking at His daughters with pure intent and a solid heart is the only way to go as well...He'll show the way for sure...

Man, reading this back to myself makes me think I have a longer way to go than I thought...Sorry if you had to read this and the maturity level was low...I'm not sure why...